shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize