finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
