No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
someone owes me an orgasm
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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