please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize
