At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
