Already got asked if we're dating
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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