Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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