im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
