so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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