There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
