I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
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