You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
