well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
as a side note pls kill me
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize