I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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