It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
