so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
