wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize
