Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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