i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I am one with the molecules
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
