I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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