How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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