hotel room ftw
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
