You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
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