his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
