pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
you inspire me to be a worse person
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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