I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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