After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize