i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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