Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
did i walk over a car last night?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
