You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize