shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
