so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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