Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
We need to get me chipped asap
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
