I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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