drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
