What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
