I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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