i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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