Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
