oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
