I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
