She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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