whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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