The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
