I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
