we made out on top of his cat.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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