I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
