i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
