would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
