Dual....:-)
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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